Goals. Or something like them?

Do you have goals?

Do you have goals?

I'll bet the majority of folks reading this would say emphatically "Yes, of course I have goals". My next question would be, does everything that you do in your life reflect those goals? Are you constantly and courageously striving towards them? Are you making waves with your goals? Changing lives? Challenging yourself or others? Are you advancing ever forward toward your goals with every fiber of your being?

Yes?!?! Awesome! You ROCK! You are one of the few, brave, resilient souls that will make a mark on this planet, leave it a better place and in doing so, gain more than you thought possible. You probably don't need this blog, heck you're probably not reading this blog because you're out affecting change in your world. Here's a hearty internet pat on the back for you, keep up the good work.

No? You're floundering? Struggling? Treading water? Maybe you're "in a holding pattern" or a "rebuilding phase". There's all sorts of names that you can assign to times when you're not chasing your goals, but the truth is, if you're not working on it, than it's NOT a goal, it's a dream.

Dreamers are great, god bless them, they dream up imaginative, creative things, some of which get given to doers that go out and create incredible works. Without dreamers our society would not be as enriched, I don't write this to drag down the dreamer, I applaud them. I write this to encourage you to be honest with yourself about which one you are.

Are you a dreamer, or are you working on your goals?

True goals can be birthed from dreams, many are. Many are also birthed from practicality, or a need for something not found in your current existence. Dreams have to turn a corner though, to become goals. It's the action, the effort, the simple fact that forward progress is being made that turns dreams into reality.

Life is full of seasons, I've heard that manny times and you can in your life be both a goal seeker and a dreamer at different times, but pretending that you're seeking a goal when you're simply dreaming is a sure way to set yourself up for frustration. Telling yourself that you are chasing a goal, when not putting in the action is the surest way to ensure that you will quit before you ever get any where close to that goal.

Today I was dreaming, literally laying in bed asleep, my alarm went off at the assigned time to wake me for an early morning cycling session, I made the conscious choice at that moment to go from being a true dreamer to truly seeking my goals. While this is a little bit of "literal hyperbole" it's that same sort of get up, get out of bed, and go sweat action that will take your dreams and make them a reality. Today I didn't reach my goals, my goals truth be told are pretty lofty, but today I made progress, today I advanced, and I know that today I'm one step closer to my goals, and that feels good.

Choose your attitude

I often start my blog post off with a story of how someone, or some encounter that day has inspired me, and sitting down tonight, I realized that I didn't have an anecdote like that today. Nothing that happened today touched me in any special way, nothing inspired me to write, nothing stopped and made me think. My first thought was, wow I surrounded myself with some duds today, I'll have to fix that tomorrow, or maybe I didn't get in enough personal development, bet I actually learned a lot today, just none of it inspired me to write as it often does. I spent a precious few minutes attempting to blame something else, someone else, but then I realized it wasn't anyones fault but my own.

I stepped off plan today, I shrugged off my morning workout, I got up late, slogged through my day, never really waking up. I didn't even enjoy my dinner with a good friend as much as I normally do. I didn't commit to today, I simply marched through it. Living my life with my eyes on my feet instead of my nose to the grindstone didn't accomplish me much today, but I can tell you that I realized tonight fully, and for the first time, that you truly do choose how your day can go.

Today I just choose wrong. Tomorrow I have a good day, tomorrow I don't let the world conquer me, I go out and conquer it!

Ride of Silence 2014

Tonight it wasn't hard to come up with a topic for this Blog. Tonight I knew what I was going to write about, and for a change I've been thinking a lot about exactly what I was going to write. Tonight was the Ride of Silence, a bicycle ride of about 8-12 miles at no more than 12mph, ridden entirely in silence in memory of those killed and injured while cycling by other vehicles, it's also to raise awareness for cyclists rights to be on the road and to be treated fairly in the hopes that a ride to memorialize those that we have lost will not be necessary.

For a few moments tonight, the cycling community came together, as we have all too few yet all too many times. For a few moments we weren't riders out of one of the shops, we were "roadies", "tri friends", or just casual peddlers, we came together, in silence for the memory and for the good of cycling as a whole. We were 66 cyclists riding out of several shops, riding several different kind of bikes, from the roadies that stayed under 12mph but never dropped below 90rpm of cadence, the lone guy in the bike on the tri bike, trying to remember to stay out of his aero bars, the man just back from a motorcycle accident on his first group ride, the passionate about biking entrepreneur on the tandem, the young lady clearly struggling with simply making it around the lake, the older rider taking extra laps at the end to get in his workout, or the big guy on the mountain bike clearly not his size.

Almost 40 years ago my father was hit while cycling home from Lakeland Regional Hospital, hit by a driver and left for dead in a ditch. He lay there, in the darkness not knowing if he would survive, the driver continued on his way. Were it not for a nurse on her way home noticing that the bike laying on the side of the road belonged to my father, he may have died in that ditch. As it was her stopping and finding him there saved his life, while she was there in time to ensure he didn't die, she wasn't there in time to save all of him. That night my father didn't lose his life, but he did lose his leg from above the knee.

I can't say that I know the pain of losing a loved one to a cycling accident, and I don't begin to compare that to the experience I'm about to detail, I lost something that day, my father lost something that day. He lost his love of cycling, he lost the freedom of the road, he lost a hobby, and although he doesn't often speak of it, I know he has mourned that loss every day since. What have I lost you might ask, while I didn't lose my father entirely, a lost a part of him, someone that I never knew, a father that would've woken up early to go for a "century" on the weekend, helped me wrench on my first road bike, maybe even cheered me on at my first bike race. While it's a lot harder to quantify the loss for me, it is still there. As I've, in the past year, gotten into cycling, I find myself looking next to me sometimes on long rides, wondering what it would be like if dad was riding alongside me, pushing me, letting me draft when I get tired, or racing me on that last stretch before we get home. He still rides, only on trails and on a trike now, which isn't quite a match for the riding that I do, crouched over aero bars for hours on end, so we bond over cycling, but all the while I notice the look when I talk about that great stretch along some road, or the flinch if I mention a "close call", make no mistake I lost something that day too.

There were lots of stories on this ride today, and the paragraphs above encapsulate only my own, but one thing that I'm sure of, all 66 of these riders came out for a reason tonight, a purpose, whether it was for a loss like mine, the loss of a close friend, a spouse, someone that that saw once a week at a shop ride, or maybe just someone that they felt a special kinship with because that person ventured out on two wheels as well, no matter what the reason I know that we gathered in that parking lot as 66 cyclists, but left that lot and rode this ride as one.

Thank you to all who came out, not just to this Ride of Silence but to them all, the world over.

Thank you to my friend Jesse Cookson for capturing this short video of the riders tonight. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=D_fzP3f-pVc

Wait your way to success.

I spent a good time today talking to a good friend about waiting. About waiting in line, waiting with patience, about waiting with hope. Most people would tell you that you can't wait for success, that if you're waiting for success to happen then you don't quite "get it" and you may never realize that success, I however disagree. I think waiting, and waiting well is a stepping stone along the road of success. 

Think about times that you're waiting in your life, waiting in line at the grocery store, waiting for a new movie to come out, waiting on that special someone at home, who never seems to get ready quite as quickly as you think that they should. These are passive kinds of waiting, the waiting where you're checking your watch, the calendar, or tapping your foot. These are the kinds of waiting that you want to avoid on the path to success. Think about the time that you spend waiting over the course of the week whether it's in the pursuit of something mentioned above, or something else, like waiting in traffic during your morning commute, or waiting at the post office, think about those times, and think about how you could change the way that you wait. 

Most people will tell you that they "don't have any time", and while it's true that we live in a fast paced, "always-on-the-go" society, don't let people fool you, but more importantly don't fool yourself with the lie that you don't have any time. The truth is everyone, rich, poor, old, young, black, white, tall, or short, we all have the exact same amount of hours in the day, no matter how much money, power, prestige, or clout you ever gain, you will always and forever only have 24 hours in the day. The difference between those that achieve, and those that don't is how they use that 24 hours, and don't think that the successful don't wait, they simply wait differently than the rest of us. 

Instead of standing in the grocery line, thumbing through the tabloids, checking to see who Prince William is dating now, or how many legs the latest baby found at Roswell has, consider striking up a conversation with the people in line with you, reach out, make contact, make a new friend. You never know what may spring up from a conversation with a stranger, the possibilities are literally endless. If you're in traffic, why not take that time to listen to something that enriches your life, make phone calls that could advance your dream, or spend it in quiet meditation, something other than listening to the inane prattle of talk radio, or pop music.

Change some of these small things in your life and all of a sudden you'll find yourself "waiting" in an entirely different way, you'll be taking charge of your dreams, your goals, and making progress towards them, all the while "waiting" in the certainty that your success will be achieved, and it is that process of "waiting" actively that will help you achieve you success.

So next time your find yourself "in line" waiting on your success, strike up a conversation, reach out, and do something proactive. Wait for your success with a certainty of purpose, with a conviction that you will not be stopped, and console yourself in the fact that it's only through waiting that greatness is achieved. 

Rise above the noise.

Today I focused on a lesson that has been a hard one for me to learn, something that I personally have struggled with for a long time. No matter what you're doing in life, if you are advancing forward towards a goal, you will alway attract detractors, "haters gonna hate" would be the modern social vernacular for this phenomenon. The startling thing is while we expect "haters" to appear, we don't expect the direction they approach us from. We all put up walls to protect ourselves from these haters, but it's often the ones that we've let inside our walls that can be our greatest critics.

We've all experienced it, when taking a new job, getting a promotion, starting a new business, or embarking on any new journey in life, there's those that we run to first, those that we are excited to brag to, because we expect them to be as excited as we are. Then our big reveal happens and they don't react like you expected, instead of jumping up and down, they simply smile and say congrats, or even worse the wellspring of support you expected is replaced by a flood of criticism.

This doesn't have to be a one-time thing, more often then not these "frienemies" as you may come to think of them, are relentless in their assault on you idea, your vision, and your life. This hurts more than the random hater, the person that you can ignore, as these people are the people that you know, trust, and have leaned on in the past.

Sometimes we have to simply focus on rising above the noise, and realize that those that should be our largest support are our biggest critics, not necessarily on purpose, but through a misguided attempt to help.

JUMP.

A wise friend recently told me a fantastic story that I just had to share. Three frogs are sitting on a log, one frog decides to jump off the log, how many frogs are left? Simple math right, this is kindergarden type stuff, I bet you didn't even have to use your toes to answer this one! You answered two, right? Well if you did, you'd be wrong, you see there's still 3 frogs sitting on this faithful log. The key word here is that I said that one frog decided to jump off of the log, the problem is he never actually did.

How many of us in our personal or professional lives have been that one frog, the one that "decides to jump" but finds himself still sitting on the log? The real lesson to be learned here is that you will never get anywhere by simply making a decision. While making the choice to do something is an important step, as there are few truly successful people that ended up there purely on accident without first deciding that they would be great, but the common thread in all great successes is that there is an action that follows the decision.

You see Thomas Edison decided he was going to invent the lightbulb, but it wasn't until after over 1,000 times "failing" to create that lightbulb that he actually came up with a working bulb. The decision to create the lightbulb was integral here, but without the action of creating it, Sir Edison would simply be another one of histories great dreamers, and it is likely that you may never had heard his name.

For every Michael Jordan out there that has put in the hard work, time and effort to become the best in their field, sport, or vocation, how many others "decided" that they were going to be the best, but never jumped off their respective logs?

So the biggest question after realizing this is how do you make the leap, how do you take the action, what is the magic formula to actually getting off that darn log? Well the answer is simple really, so simple that most of us miss it because we, as humans, must endever to complicate things to the point that our productivity simply becomes activity and we never actually get off the log. We love to plan how to get off the log, talk about the different technologies and philosophies surrounding log jumping, even read books from people who have jumped off the log before us, but it is the rare person that actually makes that fateful leap and pursues their dreams.

The answer to how we jump off the log is this; just JUMP!

Not to complicated is it? Here's my question for you to ask yourself, if it's this simple why haven't you jumped?

Community.

Tonight I attended the birthday party of one of my best friends, a man whom I love, respect, and am honored to be associated with. While I'm a certain special kind of stubborn when it comes to my opinions, when this man talks, I listen. I've watched him develop as a leader and as a man. I've watched him talk to his children, both the ones that live in his house and those that he adopts and brings into his life. I've been proud the times when I was his friend, and humble the times that he has mentored me. He's changed my life in many ways, all for the better, and I couldn't be more grateful to him. This blog post isn't about how much he means to me, he knows that, rather I'd like to discuss what I saw tonight at his party.

Tonight at a small gathering of friends and family, I got to look at my friend in another way, through the eyes of those gathered to celebrate with him. There were people from all walks of life, some that I knew well, and others that I didn't, the one thing that we all had in common was my friend, and our mutual love and respect for him. We all gathered around this one social nexus and in doing so not only enriched his life, we were able to enrich our own lives simply by congregating with one simple purpose.

I was able to step back tonight and observe for a few moments what community really looks like, to see people gathering for a reason, interacting and coming together for a common goal. There's something incredible about community, something incredible about mutual love and respect overlapping, all coming together. While some might define a community as a geographic area that folks live in, I know that I witnessed the true meaning tonight.

A Day off.

Today was a good day. I'm tempted to say that I didn't train today, but I did. Even though you won't see a Strava entry today, even though I wasn't in the pool, on my bike, out pounding the pavement running, or even cross training, I was training. I spent the majority of the day with my feet propped up, don't even think I broke a sweat. How does someone train for a triathlon without sweating? Well as my coach, is quick to remind me, we can't go full bore all the time, and not every training session is meant to create a PR.

Today if anything left me chomping at the bit, ready to rock, ready to get out there, and able to go out there and do more do better and do it all faster. Our bodies are incredible, amazing things, capable of much more than we might dream, but always capable of exactly what we think they are.

Rest days are the glue that hold your entire training plan together, they can keep you from injury, from burnout, and most importantly from quitting. I use my training days not only to rest my body but to nurture, cultivate and train my mind. I always focus just a little bit more on personal development. I take extra time to cultivate my spirituality, my mindset, or my focus on these days.

Today for me was "Still Waters Run Deep", a meditation technique that I learned about from one of my personal mentors, ex-Navy Commander Mark Divine in his book The Way of the SEAL: Think Like an Elite Warrior to Lead and Succeed. While I spent time focusing on sharpening my mind, my muscles have a chance to relax, heal, and get back in fighting shape.

While I understand that for some of us, taking a day off is hard, it might even be contrary to the competitive nature and obsessive personality that brought us into Triathlon in the first place, it's necessary and something that we must focus on and "train" just as hard as those ladder runs, interval bikes, and hard swims. Rest Day is important, and deserves our respect, and our concentration. So enjoy that next day off, but consider using it to better you mind, because as we all know, Triathlon is 90% physical and 95% mental!

Reflections on a struggle

Day 2 of my 90 day challenge started out early, I was down at Lake Hollingsworth (a local running and biking hotspot) with 7 other members of my local triathlon club, FR Racing (www.frracing.net). Getting out in the early morning hours, in this case before the sun had a chance to show its face, is a magical thing. There's something special about getting your workout done in the darkness, before the rest of the world has lifted their heads from the pillow, You feel a sense of accomplishment getting home before school traffic, before most people have even hit their snooze button for the first time.

Today was scheduled to be an hour and a half at an "uncomfortable pace" Well in the first 5 minutes I found my "uncomfortable pace" and that seemed to be simply pedaling. While I did best my last personal best for a lap around the lake by almost a minute, I couldn't sustain myself, even at a much slower pace. I was on a new bike, I was grabbing too big of a gear, I didn't get enough sleep, there's all sorts of excuses I could place on why I wasn't performing up to what I should, but the truth of the matter is, it was just one of those days.

Some days you go out and feel like you can't do any wrong, you run like the wind, or pedal like a Tour de France Winner, or maybe you glide through the water like Phelps. Those days are magical, those days are meant to be cherished.

Where there is light however, there is always shadow. The shadow is those days where you don't want to, those days when you don't feel like it, the days that you're already tired, worn down, or frustrated before you even start, the days that you just can't seem to get it going. These are the days that will haunt you, the days that will cause you to put your head down in shame, to rethink what you're doing, doubt your training, your nutrition, even your love of the sport. These are the days that really define you as an athlete, the down days, the days when you struggle.

Everyone remembers Phelps winning Golds, Meb triumphantly crossing the finish line, Ripken's 2,131st game. What people tend to forget is the days that Cal showed up not feeling great and went 0-5, or the long training days in heat or rain, with blisters or pain that Meb endured, the seemingly endless lengths of the pool that Phelps swam before the Olympic spotlight shone on him. We focus on others "highlights" and compare our everyday to that, we think about our personal bests, and wonder why we can't beat them every time. The truth is training is a struggle, winning is far less about the moment of achievement that is so visible, and far more about the hours, days, weeks, months, & years of preperation, sweat and hard work that led up to that moment.

While we all want to have that "Big Victory", our "Gold Medal Moment", we have to learn to look forward to, enjoy and even celebrate the hard days, because without their presence and our desire to push through them... our victories will never come. Next time you have a hard day, don't think about Ripken's 2,131st game, think about what it took for him to lace up for game 945 when he wasn't feeling well, think about Meb's endless training runs, and celebrate the fact that you are a doer, and only through that doing will true achievement ever be realized.

Starting Over, not quite from the start.

Today marks a big day for me, the start of a new Challenge. What's a Challenge? A Challenge is all about setting a 90 day goal, and living your life in pursuit of that goal for 90 days. Since my first Challenge, my life has changed immeasurably. I went from being a couch potato to a triathlete. Never in my life did I imagine competing in one of the events encompassed in triathlons much less all three in one day! The funny thing about a Challenge though is, at some point it's over. 90 days only lasts for 90 days. Then you have a choice, do you go back to living your life the way you were, or do you embark on another 90 day journey. I've been living this lifestyle for over a year now and while I've had victories, I think it's important to note that there have also been defeats. I'm not where I wish I would be, I haven't achieved all I want to achieve, BUT I have achieved much more than I thought I could.

I'll make a confession, the last 90 days, I haven't been "on Challenge", I haven't been drinking my Vi-Shake, I haven't been watching my nutrition, and the last 90 days have brought an attack of gout, the brief return of some of the medical issues that I used to experience, and some of my weight has come back. Some would decry their fitness regime, some would blame ViSalus, but I'm a realist, and want to be honest with both myself and you. Nothing external failed me, ViSalus works, it has worked for me. My training while not as consistent has been solid. I have failed me, my fitness and my health. I've made more bad choices than good, I've decided to live my life without keeping my goals in mind. There is no one and nothing to blame but me.

Don't think that I'm being down on myself, there's comfort in being the problem. When you're the problem you can also be the solution. If you are the only thing that is holding you back then you can change. You can make a conscious choice to be different. That's what I'm doing, I'm making a choice to change.

"My Line in the Sand"

Today I'm drawing my line in the sand, today I'm saying that enough is enough. Today I'm making the conscious choice to be better. Today I start a Challenge. My Challenge over the next 90 days is to lose 20 pounds, and I will accomplish it! It won't be easy, but I know that it will be worth it. I'll be updating this blog along the way with thoughts, stories and triumphs. Thanks for reading and look out for my next post!

The real inspiration.

I recently finished a race, near the back of the pack, I went out and simply enjoyed myself, while pushing my 3 year-old son in a stroller. While there were some great stories in this race, some I knew (a friend winning her age group the first time), and many more I did not. The story that I saw though was one that I felt I had to share.

While running off my normal pace, I ran next to men out of breath, running their first 5k. I ran with women who were struggling to walk 3.1 miles. I ran with children with such incredible joy written across their faces. The people near the back of the pack might not call themselves runners, they certainly finished well behind the front of the pack, some of which were probably home by the time the last runner crossed the finish line. While there's no taking away from the accomplishment of the runner that wins the race, their hard work determination and effort are what got them there after all, but I'd like to take a moment and applaud those at the back of the pack, those that didn't win a spot on the podium, but that simply won a personal victory by showing up and putting in the work to finish. We'll never see these folks on the front of "Runner Magazine", you'll never see them in bright gleaming HD on coverage of your favorite race. Where you will see these folks is at the next race, at the gym, and at your office.

To those that are out there just to complete it, to whom running a 9 minute mile seems a Herculean effort, I salute you, I cheer for you, and I respect you. Those at the front of the pack are runners, this is true, but no more than those that stumble across the finish line 30 minutes later, with a smile on their face, a sweaty hug for their friends and family, and maybe even a bit of a limp. There might not be as many people at the finish line when you make it across, but don't let that lessen you sense of accomplishment. Take that race shirt, wear it proudly, and brag to everyone that will listen about your race! Congrats back of the pack, you're what truly inspires me.